Why Hello Kitty Deserves an Orgasm
Look, I’m aware Hello Kitty is an 8 year old girl, yes, a GIRL, not a KITTY as her name would lead you to believe. I mean…the girl has whiskers. And EVERYONE but me knew she wasn’t a cat???? So I’m here thinking ‘okay maybe she is a furry, and “Kitty”stands for her occupation’, just as someone with the last name of Baker or Smith was used to signify their job or Jacobson to signify they are a Jew. I digress. At the risk of sounding like one of THOSE people, you know the ones who watch anime or read comics and the girls are drawn to look like 10 year olds with bazongas, but “technically they are 12,000 years old and their powers make them look young,” Hello Kitty has been around since 1974, so…you do the REAL MATH. We have established now it’s not taboo in saying that she deserves to orgasm, and she represents all those who cannot. Have you ever met a Hello Kitty stan who WASN’T on SSRIs?? Not to beat a dead horse, but her name should be’ Hello Is this my Therapist’s Office?’ instead.
And you know what, back to this furry thing, how come no one’s fursona is EVER anything other than a dog? This point has been made before but I brought my soap box out, I might as well get up on it. There are like a gillion animals you could be and you choose the same beta brown dog with fingerless paw gloves. I want to see some fucking guinea pig fursonas. A god damn whale shark with a BBL. The other day I actually saw someone who has a worm fursona (@zeetheracoon) and I thought, I don’t get it, but that’s a furry I can get behind, a furry that I’d happily donate to their gofund me to get out of an “abusive housing situation”. What a pit the fursona community has fallen into.
Back to the orgasm at hand. I think Hello Kitty should be able to wack one out, let off some steam. She carries the entire borderline personality community on her little teeny tiny bow, and does it with a smile. Or at least I think she does, she doesn’t have a mouth. I just think it would inspire those that are cum blocked, if Hello Kitty can orgasm, so can you queen!